Today, we are going to be talking about your communication skills. We are going to get you in “communicado con migo”.
We are talking about one simple tip to DRASTICALLY improve your communication skills. This is something that I learned in the Landmark Forum. Though, I am not sure because I took it when I was 9, 13, and 18 years old. That was a LOT of years old ago.
But, I think it comes from the Landmark forum. If you have never taken the Landmark forum, you should check that out.
Anyway, the advice I want to give you today is about how to improve your communication skills by setting contexts for your communication. This is very simple. I will demonstrate it through an example.
Communication Skills – How to Set Context
The other day, I and my mother were talking and she was bringing this really exciting business opportunity to me that she was working on. She was running it by me, sharing the EXCITEMENT of the new partnership she is creating.
So, I started poking holes. I was poking holes and I recognized that I did not set my contexts yet so I took a step back and I said:
“By the way mom, I am only poking holes to illuminate anything that might not be fleshed out yet, that might need some more attention. I am doing it fully out of the intention of having you create a wonderful new partnership and having an amazing business deal. So, please hear me from that perspective.”
“Oh, absolutely! I totally get that.”
So, she already understood the context.
That’s what I mean by setting a context because now, she can hear me from the place that I need her to hear me from. She knows where my communication is coming from.
If she did not know that I was poking holes out of the desire to have her have a powerful business deal, she might think I am attacking her. Or, she might think I am in a grumpy mood. Or, she might think I am being a jerk.
She does not know the context of my communications. So, I cannot fault her either if she thinks I am a jerk or she thinks that I am grumpy. Or, she thinks anything other than what my intention is because I never set the context for my communications. It works both ways.
The way to really, POWERFULLY improve your communication skills is to make sure that during EVERY important communication, you are always setting the context of what the communication is about.
If you‘ve watched my video on relationship advice, I mentioned that, in my relationship, we have what we call “clearing conversations” which comes from the context of discussing and dialoguing anything that is on our mind to stay within a relationship of un-smudged, unhindered love – no drops of gray in the white. It is just PURE white. We do that by dialoguing under the context of that reason.
Another thing that you could create a context around is when you are coaching somebody. If they do not know that you are coaching them, they might hear it as ATTACKING.
Or, you might create a context around sharing yourself simply for the sake of sharing yourself. If you just want to vent, let somebody know:
“Hey, this communication is really just to vent. I feel like I needed to let this out there.”
Then, the person is ready to be the receiver of your venting.
So, now there is a context created and the communication is EMPOWERED by a mutual understanding of that context.
I hope I have simplified it enough so you can understand because this is really such a simple way to DRASTICALLY improve your communication. You will make sure that you are always being heard. You will make sure that they know how to hear you. You will get better results out of ALL your communications.
I hope that has been helpful. If it was clearly communicated, put below “Way to communicate!” I would love to see “Way to communicate!” from at least three people.
And, I will say “Way to be in communication!” Then, we will have a little e-high five!
Thanks for watching. I hope it has been helpful. Check me out tomorrow on my next video.
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To Your Success,