Today, we are going to be talking about the phrase “should have” and why it‘s one of the most DEADLY and common habits that you could have.
We’re also going to be talking about how you can change it and see a RAPID improvement in your languaging and the results.
I Should Have… – No, You Could Have!
The reason “should have” is such a terrible habit and way to language and to express is because every time you it “should have”, you are declaring that there is something negative or WRONG with your current situation, who you currently are, the way things currently are, etc.
You are saying there is something wrong with the here and now and that it “should be” some other way.
So, “I should have done that” means what I did was wrong. There is a better way to do it. I am a bad person.
“I should be like that person. I should be like Noah.” It means I’m bad. I am broken and I need to fix myself and be like that instead.
“I should have gotten that job.” It means my current job is bad. My current income is bad and I should strive for that ideal thing.
Every time you experience a “should have”, you are actually experiencing a current negative assessment. You are experiencing a “make wrong” of yourself, the people around you, the situation, or whatever it might be. Because of this languaging, you are creating a consistent NEGATIVE vibration throughout your life.
Fortunately, it’s very easy to fix this. What I would recommend is simply replacing the word “should” with “could”. You could have. You could have a different job. You could be like that. You could have done that other thing. You didn’t but you COULD have.
See how that small language change and SHIFTS the message? It’s no longer a “make wrong”. It’s now a POSSIBILITY.
It’s no longer:
“I am bad and that other thing is better. I am bad for not being that other thing.” It’s now: “Oh, I see an awareness of something else that I would like to strive for, something else that I could chose to do.”
So, it’s ultimately going to bring you forward in your life, raise your consciousness, existence, and ability to create your life because you are not going to be fighting yourself. You’re not going to be making yourself WRONG.
You are only going to be injecting possibility into your life and you are only going to be creating that potential future for yourself. You are going to be free.
Replace your “should’s” with “could’s” and it opens up everything for you.
Another thing I would recommend is:
“I choose to” instead of “I should do this”
This means that instead of saying: “I am wrong if I don’t do it so I will try to do it” you could say “I CHOOSE to do this”.
As in “I have weighed the situation with my awareness and I have made a decision. I choose to do this thing. It’s not because I have to. It’s because I choose to. It’s not because I should. I CHOOSE to.”
So, get conscious of your languaging around goals, achievements, and personal developments. Every time that you are making yourself wrong, you are DISEMPOWERING yourself. Even if it’s only a little bit, you are creating negative momentum inside of your progress.
Every time you create possibility with words like “could” or certainty with words like “choose”, you are empowering yourself to get the result that you truly want.
Let me know a few things that you should have done in your life. Comment below and share some things that you should have done. Let me know if you are willing to let that go and change it into a “could” and experience the power and the internal shift that come when you do that.
I would highly recommend you writing it down below this video because it’s going to release it from you. It’s going to get it on writing. It’s going to get it out of you. These things are inside you so put them out there and release them. Say: “I used to think I should do this. Now, I realize I could do this.”
I will make sure to reply with an “Awesome!” because I love to see you guys sharing. I love to get you guys involved in the conversation.
I hope this video has been helpful. Please like it if you liked it. Subscribe to my channel. Check me out on Facebook and meet me tomorrow for another video. Thanks for joining me.
To Your Success,